Tuesday, 31 August 2010

Lose Me

Give it a chance to end
Act like I'm dead
Forget all the promises we sat
Ignore everything we said
You can't force it
We can't challenge destiny
And this wasn't meant to be
Losing this round is not a failure
Trying to win it is a waste

Wednesday, 18 August 2010

Frozen Hell

Looking at my life
What been and now
Been searching for signs
Fooled by all sides
Lost and victimized
Captivated by delusion
Love, Hate confusion
Terrified but need execution
Three elements set destiny
Games, Lies and insanity
Sounds like fun to be me
Action movie of breaking free
Can't judge what you didn't see
Keep asking why to be
Death seems sweet honestly
Plans we're set A, B and C
I hold back to not fall
One move and I lose it all
Taught to respect and ignore
This time my back was against the wall
It was time to set a war
Fire could only rage hell more
But I had the flames
I had control
When it was done
It was easy to let go

Wednesday, 11 August 2010

Away 5

Aug, 11th 2010

The Only feeling I did not confess was that I knew You were here somewhere you only knew and the people you are with, but I could not get near you or feel you or even hear you. I tried to accept the fact that you are gone and I seriously wanted to believe that lie and fool myself but it was just too hard to swallow, it was huge and we both knew its a lie.

Day;; 5

You are back as assuming you were away from the first place, I tried to move on and go back to my long lost acting career and be a star actress. As you are the director of the play we are playing you gave me the leading role and focused at the behind the scenes, also counted me of an V.I.P audience, because this show was invented for me to be blinded with some lies. But you forgot what I told you before I'm smart and I would stalk you if I want to, but this time i let you get away and play as you want and hear who laugh at last.
Sorry if I did not like the show and walked out.

Tuesday, 10 August 2010

Away 4

Aug, 10th 2010

There is nothing in this world more adoring to my heart than hearing you say it or read it when I need it the most, imaging that laugh which is my favorite ever..

Day 4;;

I loved this day. It began with my smile which I've faked so much since you've been gone. I got it back cause you sent me a message exactly at 6;30;46, I was shocked, happy, felt like crying, jumping, and screaming, also I knew the meaning of having the rush of the adrenaline moving through my veins. It was amazing I stared at the message for so long and got flash backs a lot of you, some was happy and some were sad, I got freshed up and I enjoyed my day.

Lonely Girl

A lonely girl definition is not identified properly, for a girl to live in loneliness is nothing like shes gonna be in a place which is completely empty, thats never the right description, she can never do captivation wither its by her or by force. That kinda girl is always with the crowed, she is very social, very opened and very in control, shes also very smart and amazingly lucky. Shes a master in fooling the world, she knows all the tricks and she like to flip heads. But the nickname lonely came from the smallest place she owns which is her heart. A place she loved to take care of by herself and don't allow untrusted people to interfere or get close to her heart, so they won't break or destroy it, however that place needs a mess from time to time to learn how to fix it again, or better yet a person who would make it stronger and treat it as his own.

Away 3

Aug, 9th 2010

I needed the touch, the grab and the hug. I wanted to get lost between your arms, lay on your chest and close my eyes.

Day;; 3

It started weird, I was tired, hungry and needed a shower. Humidity was raising so my hair was a mess and I had a bad hair day. I went to my BFF wedding party, it was so much fun and I looked fabulous as always. The bride was a beauty queen and the party was wow. I danced, laughed and ate cause I was so very hungry. I went back home at 11:30, I was not thinking about you that much but I've wished I could see you and hold your hand cause I was looking pretty. And I slept with Your T-shit on.


I try to be lost in the crowed, and I try to change my thoughts, thinking I might be happier, thinking I can forget about you, but still I wish you were here so I can see your joy which would make me smile, laugh and forget everybody around, cause all matter to me is you..

Monday, 9 August 2010

Away 2

Aug, 8th 2010

The voice I use to hear, it was the one which can heat me up til I'm burned, and calm me down til I'm frozen. Its missing I need it back ..

Day;; 2

It Started with a fake dream, tears transformed to knives, and light was dark although it was so bright. It was all weird to me, I had a feeling that I would see you today but I was wrong. I went with my family to the chalet, had very humid pleasing time, laughed, planned stuff which did not work, ate and finally went home exhausted, yet still thinking about you, and I slept wearing your shirt as usual.


It feels so lonely, but really I don't need anyone to vanish this feeling unless its you.
For some reason, I cry you, I miss you and finally I love you. I wish sometimes that I never knew you, cause you are killing me and you know it, I'm breaking, melting, I hate whats happening and what you are changing but I do it anyways. I'm in the middle of an ocean, I dunno how to swim and I'm sinking deep, deep inside dying slowly, you know you can find me, save me If you wanted to, But I don't get it why won't you ..

Away 1

Aug, 7th 2010

Never felt more lost, broke and directions were very blury ..

Day 1;;

Time was going by very slowly, its like for the first time in my life time actually notice me, And obviously knows how to torture me. So the plan began, Time had holden the world for me, when I really needed it to run faster and faster than it ever did before, and with a snap everything would come back as I wanted it. But Time made me see we can't always get what we wish for.

Wednesday, 4 August 2010


She swore you're tied to her destiny
But she's burning your soul up with misery
Burred your emotions in agony cemetery
Your heart is a place she flagged her territory
Played you as another broken record of pain
Got you to beg in your knees "Enough scares I gain"
And you still shout let settle our case again
You loved her as much as the drops of a rain
Nothing can change now as she's all fake
She destroyed you like another useless slave
Blinded you with screams of love
Let you fly like an angel and see what's high above
Now Game Over and you're off the list, Bye bye

Sunday, 1 August 2010

A Wish

It started with an empty dream
Like staring at an empty screen
All I want is a chance to scream
I could really use a wish right now
I would really wish for a lot if I knew how
And raise my head high never bow
I wanna tore my black past apart
I wanna live with new emotions new heart
Never hold a regret, Never Doubt
But that all still a wish list
Sad and lonely, Mad and real shitt
That how reality been fixed
And forever will be if we accepted